It’s the job that’s never started as takes longest to finish.
— J.R.R. Tolkien
Much of the stress that people feel doesn’t come from having too much to do. It comes from not finishing what they started.
— David Allen
Hello, my name is Carol and I have a problem finishing things.
I thought this was limited to finishing writing things – stories, poems, novels – but last week I found out differently. It was a dark and dismal day. My eyes were bugging me too much to spend it reading (like I normally would) and the writing wasn’t going well, so I decided to clean out my craft closet.
Trust me, this was not a project to be undertaken lightly, it’s a huge closet. One of the things I discovered (besides the fact that no matter how much stuff I get rid of it’s still a squeeze to put the rest back) was a bunch of unfinished craft projects. Stitchery, sewing, knitting, crocheting – dating back to anywhere from recent to before the dawn of time.
This is when the light bulb suddenly went off. Not finishing things is a more serious problem than I realized. Which begs the question, where does this fear of finishing come from?
On a whim, I did a Google search on “fear of finishing” and I was surprised to discover it really is a thing.
I went for years not finishing anything. Because, of course, when you finish something you can be judged… I had poems which were re-written so many times I suspect it was just a way of avoiding sending them out.
— Erica Jong.
In extreme cases, fear of finishing is called atychiphobia, which is a fear of failure. I’m not quite that bad, I’ve finished six books, a handful of stories, and many craft projects. But I found it interesting to learn that the fear of finishing is linked to anxiety and depression, which I do suffer from. It’s a type of loss, leaving something you’ve become attached to once you’re finished it. You own it while you’re doing it, but once it’s done it’s . . . done.
Fear of finishing manifests itself in self-doubt, procrastination, and perfectionism. I have to admit this applies to me in both the writing and the crafting. But the good news is these are things that can be overcome.
If you have a fear of finishing like me, here are some things you can try:
Make a list of projects and pick only one or two. The rest go on a “to do later” list.
Plan for finishing (but also plan for setbacks).
Break a project down into easy to reach stages.
Enlist a friend to help you with accountability – tell them about what you’re working on and have them bug you until you finish.
Despite it being a rather dark and dismal week weather-wise, I actually got some work done – be still my heart. Granted the new words were mostly on the blogs, but I did get all my posts done on time, and I did a short prompt story.
I’m about halfway through The Dressmakers of Auschwitz by Lucy Adlington. I was right about it being fascinating reading – it should be required reading in history classes of the holocaust. I’m also about halfway through another anthology by Ellen Datlow and Terri Windling, Teeth, which as you might guess is a collection of vampire stories.
The Week Ahead . . .
This week’s spice is allspice, which is not a blend as I’ve always assumed. You’ll have to check it out Wednesday to see what it is.
Well la di da! I took my own advice and went to town on Magical Mayhem, and edited 131 pages last week. That’s a third of the way done. Woot! Let’s see how I do this week.
I didn’t get a poem done for the poetry group meeting last week, but it was a zoom meeting anyway and I don’t zoom. I’m just not feeling the poetry but I’d better suck it up because Friday is the first Friday of the month, which means I need to do a poetry post.
I was going to say that I didn’t write every day but I did do something creative, but that’s not exactly true. There were times during the editing process where I had to re-write a passage, so I think that counts as writing every day. Goal met!
Let’s see how I do this week.
